Maybe you're a teenager with your first boyfriend, or maybe you're already a little older but have always struggled whenever you have to share news of a relationship with your strict folks. Alternatively, maybe you're a guy yourself, struggling with how to tell your parents you're gay. Whatever way, telling your parents that you have a boyfriend can be intimidating, but if you approach the topic the right way, they might be willing to accept the news. If things go really well, they might even be happy for you. Here are a few suggestions about how to get the task done with as little tension as possible.
How To Tell Your Parents You Have A Boyfriend
I've been a little hesitant to tell you that I have a boyfriend because I think you think that I'm not old enough. Get it over with. Once you sit down, you just need to get the conversation over with.
Jun 03, Figure out who to tell first. You might have a parent you feel closer to or maybe one of your parents tends to be more lenient than the other. Oftentimes, breaking the news to a parent who is easier to talk to can clear the way for talking to the other parent. For instance, if you grew up as a "daddy's girl," meaning you can now wrap him around your little finger, you might start with your dad 73%(77). Jun 10, Telling your parents you have a boyfriend can be tough to navigate, but you can do it. Before you act, have a plan in mind and be patient and open with your parents. It can be as simple as you saying, "Mom, Dad, I have some news that I would like to share with you," or the conversation can be more in-depth than that if you prefer. May 09, The less your potential boyfriend negatively interferes in your relationship with your parents, the more likely your parents will be convinced to let you have a relationship with him. If your parents find out that you were dating this guy in secret before getting their permission, they may demand an end to the relationship%(85).
Don't beat around the bush. However, you can soften the blow with qualifiers. For instance, you could say, "I really love you two, and I don't want to make you mad. Also, I really want to be honest with you about my life. I want to tell you about the boy that I've started dating.
Talk about why you feel you are ready to date. If you are trying to make a case for dating, lay out the reasons why you think you should be able to.
For instance, maybe you think that you should be able to date because you are in high school, and most people your age are allowed to date. Be reasonable, and don't get angry if your parents don't agree.
Your parents probably won't respond well to "But everyone else is doing it! Be willing to negotiate. If you're parents don't want you to date and you're asking them to let you, you need to be willing to compromise.
Maybe you can suggest that you only see your boyfriend at school or that you only go on group dates with other people. Your parents just want to protect you, so you have to be willing to give up some of your freedom. Although they may be frustrating sometimes, remember that your parents are older and have more experience than you do.
They may spot red flags or issues of concern that you haven't experienced yet. If they express concerns, watch out for signs that they could be true.
Discuss the person. Tell your parents about your boyfriend. Talk to them about his family and what you like about him. Highlight his good qualities so they get a sense of who he is. It's also helpful to have a photo for them to see. It is advisable to answer every question as honestly and fully as possible to reassure them about your new relationship. If you try to hide or lie about something, your parents may become suspicious and anxious. If your boyfriend has a good relationship with his family, make sure your parents know.
This trait is a major plus for many parents because it lets them know that this new guy in your life knows how to value others and can appreciate the tight ties of family. Don't try to hide it. One of the most important things to do if you want your parents to accept your boyfriend is to be the one to tell them about your relationship. If they find out about your relationship from someone else, they may assume that you were trying to hide it because you felt you were doing something wrong.
As a general rule, the sooner you own up to the relationship, the better.
Nov 07, Tell your parents and any other folks about you think is compatible and everything you mentioned here. Then mention how old he is very calmly and tell them it is not relevant at the moment. You are dating him and think hes perfect. Also say he would like to meet you all. Then ask him to meet them. Your family will see that you both care for. How to tell parents your dating an older man - Register and search over 40 million singles: matches and more. Want to meet eligible single man who share your zest for life? Indeed, for those who've tried and failed to find the right man offline, internet dating can provide. How to get a good woman. It is not easy for women to find a good man, and to be honest it is not easy for a man to find a. Sep 24, 17 Harsh Truths About The Older Boyfriend. lies and secrets will strain your relationship. And if you tell them, you'll deal with all-out fights. The 16 Best Things About Dating an Older Guy;.
Avoiding the conversation will only make it harder to have eventually and will increase the odds that your parents may find out from another source. Once you get older and have already moved out of the house, you do not necessarily need to bring up every date or every boyfriend you have.
Wait until a guy comes along that you can exclusively and seriously commit to before getting everyone worked up. Method 2 of Wait on the negatives.
How to tell your dad youre dating an older guy
If you know something about your boyfriend is going to bother your parents, don't start out the conversation with that. Instead, wait until the middle or end of the conversation to talk about it. For instance, if your boyfriend is older than you, you might want to hold off on that bit of news until near the end of the conversation. Understand your parents may be upset.
If you're going against your parents expectations of you, they are probably going to be upset. You're just going to have to deal with their anger and even tears, until you can get them to see reason. Give it time. It may take a little while for your parents to get used to the idea.
If they get upset while you are talking to them and tell you "no," they might change their minds later when they've cooled down a bit. Either way, you need to respect the fact that you still need to have a relationship with them, meaning you can't just write them off as evil because they told you no.
Method 3 of Wait until the time is right. This kind of discussion is a difficult one, especially if you aren't sure how your parents will react.
Wait until you feel comfortable having the discussion. It can be hard if you're questioning your sexuality, as your parents may try to convince you're actually not gay.
You can have feelings for another guy now, yet decide later that you prefer women. Sexuality can change over time. But even if that happens later on, it does not invalidate your current feelings or your current relationship. Do a practice run. While coming out to anybody is difficult, try coming out to someone who you know is sympathetic first. For instance, if you have a gay friend or know someone who is a gay ally, talk to him or her about your sexuality before addressing it with your parents.
It's very hard to say the first time, so trying it out on someone else first can make it slightly easier on you when you do go to your parents. Plus, the person may be able to give you some tips if he or she is gay. Just be sure you completely trust the person first. Present them with the facts. If you need to convince your parents, try presenting them with facts about homosexuality.
Give them time. Many parents need time to adjust to this announcement. Because most parents expect their kids to be straight, they have to change their own thinking about who you are.
Let them know it's okay to take time to adjust. I know I did. Understand when it's not a good idea. If you know your parents will react very badly because of their beliefs, you may want to rethink coming out to your parents. That is, if you think your parents may kick you out or even be physically violent with you, it's best to wait until you are able to support yourself. Plan where you will go if things get heated, and know who you can turn to for emotional support.
Method 4 of Listen to their concerns. Love can blind us. Your parents might be overreacting to the fact that you have a boyfriend. On the other hand, they probably have some legitimate concerns that you should take into consideration. Maybe a trait of his makes them feel anxious, and that anxiety could very well have validity and be something you should think more deeply about. Even if the reasons they give do not seem significant, listening to their doubts and fears will give you an idea of what you need to do to convince them that the relationship is okay after all.
Understand their role.
Good parents take the job of protecting their children very seriously, so it is only natural that they may have to struggle to accept the fact that you are growing up. Try having a little compassion for them. No matter how the conversation goes, you should treat your parents with respect.
If you can disagree with them about something in a respectful way, your parents are likely to feel less upset and may eventually be persuaded to change their minds. Determine whether or not to keep the relationship going. Figure out how much the relationship with your boyfriend means to you and how drastically your relationship with your parents might be strained if you continue dating.
Weigh the pros and cons of all sides to reach a conclusion about what to do.
? telling my parents about my age gap relationship ?
Yes, of course you love your boyfriend, but your parents will be your parents for life. Keep talking. If you are unwilling to stop seeing your boyfriend, keep bringing the topic up to your parents. The more you talk things through, the better both sides will be able to understand each other. You may even get your parents to relent. The more time they spend with him, the more accurate their perception of him will be.
If he really is a good guy, they might eventually drop their guard long enough to see that. It's a good idea to arrange a casual meeting before you tell your parents about your relationship.
For example, your boyfriend could attend a group hangout in your home with other friends. This allows your parents to become familiar with him. Discuss the matter with your boyfriend. A good guy will understand that winning the approval of your parents is an important step in your relationship. Together, the two of you might be able to figure out some way of convincing your parents to confer their blessing upon you. If your parents offered specific reasons for why they do not approve of your boyfriend, letting him know about these reasons may prompt him to try to fix whatever behavior or condition has them feeling anxious.
Ask his parents for help. Discuss your relationship with your boyfriend's parents, and seek their approval. If they approve, they might be willing to talk to your parents and try to persuade them, too. Adults tend to relate to each other better than they relate to teenagers, so if two respectable adults approach your parents and defend your relationship, offering their assurances about their son in the process, your parents might be willing to take this new evidence into careful consideration.
My mom won't let me date, but I really what to. How do I make sure it is okay with my mom and dad? Paul Chernyak, LPC. Talk to your parents about why you want to date and why you feel you're ready.
Listen to what they have to say and why they oppose you dating. Try to reach a compromise so that you're both on the same page about when you can start dating. Not Helpful 8 Helpful Practice by telling someone else first, such as a cousin or sibling. Respond to their reactions and any concerns they express.
Consider how they feel about the idea of you dating as you consider their reactions, however. Include your email address to get a message when this question is answered. Related wikiHows. More References About This Article. Co-authors: ated: March 21, Categories: Dating. Deutsch: Teil deinen Eltern mit dass du einen Freund hast. My parents know I make good decisions, and they know that they can't really stop me from seeing him, but I just want to tell them in the best way possible.
Keeping everyone happy. Any advice? First focus on the positive part. Tell your parents and any other folks about you think is compatible and everything you mentioned here. Then mention how old he is very calmly and tell them it is not relevant at the moment.
You are dating him and think hes perfect.
Also say he would like to meet you all. Then ask him to meet them. Your family will see that you both care for each other. Chances are it will go well. I'd also suggest waiting a it longer and see ho it works out.
If you are completly sure of the relationship then slowly tell your parents. Don't hold back anything just be straight and honest as much as you can.
Make sure you talk it over with the man and tell him your serious as long as he is and go for it. BUT take into concideration of the future, you are both at a different stage in life so make sure you are sure :.
Get it over with. Your parents will never ever be completely happy with it early on, and they would be weird if they did.