I'm a Midwesterner with a background in writing and media. My articles are mainly about relationships, dating, and heartbreak. Sometimes it is hard to tell whether someone likes you or not. This article will help you figure out when a guy isn't interested in you, based on how he texts. Of course, all rules have exceptions, and some people are just bad at texting. Be careful not to jump to conclusions too quickly or overanalyze things.
I'm confused. Should I move on? I have this friend more like crush but yeah he's also my friend who was my classmate since we were elementary, separated from another class in high school and then became classmate again from our senior year high school. After graduation, I never heard anything from him. Until now he made an account because he is working abroad. He chatted me to say hi and greeted me a happy new year.
Until we keep on chatting everytime he goes home from is work. I even opened to him about my depression and he just keeps on asking question about it which i am really thankful. I gotta admit I had a crush on him since high school and we never had this kind of conversation ever.
I don't know if he's just replying to me out of sympathy or just being there as a friend. Now I don't know what should I follow up to his reply because I accidentally wrong sent to him.
Hi : I met this guy on some social media, he texted me first, he also texted me the day after and we had a casual, funny conversation. I said in a funny way that i will move to Africa and he said no, we will go together in Cuba, Jamaika etc.
How to Tell Through Texting If He Doesn't Like You (45 Signs)
In general, he is asking me questions about my hobbies, stuff i like etc. So, the third day i was the one who texted him. He asked me how my day was, which medical courses are my favourite i am studying medicinehe also said he isn't having a great day, he was going to watch some tv series and i said i am not gonna bother you any further and he said we will talk another time. So, how should i know if he is interested in keep texting me?
My favorite texts to receive from guys are:
How can i not become dull through texting? Because texting is really not my greatest asset. Guy texts me everyday who works at my place. We've been out. He's still texting.
Not interested in dating text
I'm confused if he likes me. I've been friends with a guy from another country. Long distance friendship. Now he no longer text me like 1 month and 18 days. What should I do. And why so. I meet this guy at work. We were in orientation and he kept smiling at me and looking at me. I couldn't help but notice. He is a cutie I thought. Now mind you I barely texted him or talked to him. I kind of took offense to it. I was like really, I do?
First time I ever heard that. Now it feels a little awkward. It seems like I start the conversation in texting. He always responds. In our second conversation he asked me why I work so many jobs, what was going on with my life that made me want to work so much and not have any down time. I told him there are other reasons why and he said he seen that in my text.
What should I do? Should I even try to text him anymore? If I see him at work say hi and let it be? I just had this feeling he was into me at first but now I am thinking maybe he never was really into me. He was just being friendly. Ok so there's this guy who's been driving me insane for over a year now and i could really use some advice.
We first met last year at college. He was dreamy. We started talking and texting all day long. He would say sweet things. I had visited his dorm twice and while there he just wanted to kiss A LOT. He kept asking what turns me on and stuff. We never did anything sexual cause I told him I don't do that upon just meeting somebody. He would walk me to my car and he would just look at me in a dreamy way and smile whenever he saw me. But then he disappeared after talking for a week.
I would text him and get no response. Four months later he hits me up, we basically go back to how we were but now he was different.
That dreamy look in his eyes was gone. He wasn't anything like a gentleman like before. He wouldn't even walk me out the door anymore unless I begged. When we were together he would just be on his phone. He didn't want to kiss me. And he was more sexual. And we had oral sex but nothing more. I think I only went through with it cause I felt pressured. He stayed around for a week again, disappeared again, and blocked me on his social media. I was hurt. But 6 months later he's back now confessing his feelings for me.
Talking about how he's been thinking about me, how he's been missing me, and why do I never hit him up? Do you have a boyfriend now? Could we go back to how things used to be? I went over again cause I wanted to talk face to face to see if he was serious about being serious this time. But when I was there, he said he's not an affectionate lovey-dovey type of guy. He's just chilling and wants a "bond" with someone. Felt like he was implying he didn't want a relationship just a bond.
He tried be sexual again but I told him no cause this is literally the first day I've seen you in months.
He said he wants me to spoil him? I tried to get him to spit out what he meant by that. He won't text me now unless I text him first. I just don't like these games. I feel like he wants me to chase him or something. Can you give some clarity to my situation? Why does he do these things? Also, sorry for the long paragraph. Thank you for your time, I really appreciate it. So I was dating a guy for 5 months and I found out he was cheating on me with another girl.
I love him a lot and don't want 2 loose him. My heart is broken right now. I think he is looking for a way to tell me we cant talk anymore or so.
Don't focus too much on someone who is taken. Go do you, enjoy what you have, and find someone who is available and likes you for you. And also, don't sweat it. There is plenty of time to do other things of interest besides dating. Well a guy has been ignoring me he's been dating an ugly girl named Natalie she's not very pretty but I am just his friend but I'm not sure for how much longer he might be trying to be a good boyfriend but he's been an awful friend in the process.
Hi, I met this guy while on vacation. Long story short I had a week left on my vacation and we tried several times to get together. His ex wife was away and he had his kids ages 3, 7 and 9. His ex wasn't supposed to be gone as long as she was and it made it difficult for us to see eachother again.
We talked nearly everyday and both felt there may be something there than just a one night stand. I go back to the same vacation spot regularly as I have a house there. I mentioned I'd be back in October and he seemed excited about the idea again. Since I've been back, we've texted and I asked him what a good weekend was for him.
His response 'I'm sure there is a day in there that'll work, as you already know my stuff is just all over the board. Which is why I don't like to say yes and then I have to cancel.
I hate having to do that. I also asked if this was too much pressure for him and he was certainly under no obligation as like I said I come back regularily anyway. I also made it clear we don't have to stay in touch if that's what he prefers. His response 'No pressure at all, like you said similar boats. Just always a busy schedule. I've been talking to this guy for a month he is long distance and things were going great until the two week mark hit and he said he fell out of love with me and canceled the plans we made to hangout the day before.
Jun 15, But the truth of the matter is, you should stop dating someone you lose interest in as soon as possible-it's never easy to break things off, but the longer you wait, the more time both of you are wasting. Here are a few tips about how to tell someone you're Author: Karen Belz. 7 Ways to Tell a Guy You're Not Interested Honesty is saporiviafrancigena.com saporiviafrancigena.com Him up with a saporiviafrancigena.com Avoid Contact. (more items). Jun 02, When it comes to online dating etiquette, it's good to remember the golden rule-treat others the way you'd like to be treated. It's not good to leave people hanging because you're afraid to say you're not interested. Be honest. Be kind. You may be surprised how much people appreciate it, and how better you feel. Freelance saporiviafrancigena.com: Brianne Hogan.
I got upset and left. He said he would do anything to be my friend again so I forgave him. We started acting all flirty and he said he wanted everything back as a couple of days went on.
I asked if he wanted to call me, and he said he was busy playing video games with his friends which he does all day long for a week his parents are divorced and he only has video games at one parents house and for that reason we got in a huge fight.
He denied everything about the flirting and wanting everything back and said he only wants to be friends for now. Now I'm getting huge anxiety because his texts seem like he is bored of me in a way. Like he is replying with a one word text and he takes long to reply. I don't know what to do. I also feel like he doesn't want to hangout but I might be overthinking it. And with the long distance, he is only an hour away and my friends live there too.
I just don't want to waste my time if he doesn't like me. Hopefully this made sense. I met this guy on bumble, it's been a month and we've gone on two dates. In the beginning he would text me everyday, and vice-versa.
And the two dates have gone pretty well. And after that he really doesn't text me much anymore. I am the one usually intiating a conversation. He did once text me he was thinking about me but since then he hasn't texted me. I have been texting him. I don't know what went wrong or why he has kinda backed up with his text messages.
Any advice!? Should I just move on and leave it alone. I haven't texted him since Thursday and he hasn't bothered to text me either.
I am in need of advice myself. I started talking to this guy in April we met on a dating site. He seemed interested by saying i'm the whole package for him and that he really likes me, and he tells me to be patient with him because he gets really busy. He stopped texting me all of a sudden.
After a month passes he texts me out of the blue saying he's sorry he went mia and that he was dealing with alot of stuff which i understood.
Well we started to text again for about five days straight, we talked about our parents and how much we loved each other and we had finally made us official.
We plan to meet in June.
What should i do? He claims he loves me too. Please help. Hey Andrea! So it's been like a month and a half and still nothing!! He hasn't reached out at all.
I wish I did have a way of knowing anything else of what is going on, no I don't have his Facebook or any other social media. In a typical situation, I would say a few days makes sense. If it is going longer than that, then something is up. Now, the thing is - sometimes guys do a disappearing act and then they'll come back to try to woe you a couple of months down the road, or years. I've had it happen myself where I didn't think a guy would interact with me again, but then popped up for no clear reason at all.
So yes, you can say that he might pop up. The longer the two of you knew each other, spent time together, and have lives interacting in similar spheres - the more likely he will show up. But if it was a connection made through something online or a bar - you might not have as good of a chance of him popping up randomly. I know that can be anxious because you just don't know what time frame you're dealing with and then you have feelings, it would be nice to have closure on what happened and move forward one way or another.
I can say online dating produces the most ghosting. Do you have him on Facebook or other social media accounts?
His silence is really strong here. I do suggest not contacting him since you sent so many messages and let him come back to you. I wish we knew why he was not interacting with you. I hope this helps. Is there a standard length of time that it would reasonably take to determine whether or not he is just taking some space or gone for good? I mean I am not going to be waiting around for him I have to focus on myself, but how long do guys usually need?
Like a few weeks? A few months? I find it hard to imagine he would be done for good, when he had said so many things about how he did like me and enjoy talking to me. But his abrupt silence two weeks ago still makes me feel like there is still that possibility he is done for good.
I am just unsure of what I might want to expect as far as time Would I be an idiot to start talking to him again if he suddenly resurfaces in a month A lot of girls online seem to say that if a guy ignores them when he's mad then they are just done with him if he come around a few weeks or months later.
I just wish he could have said whether he needed time or if he was done for good! There's like no way of knowing and since email was our own mode of communication it just feels final. I have no clue how long the average guy needs to "shut off" to deal with stuff! I am here for you! Feel free to use me as a resource, and I'll try my best to give you some solid feedback.
Thanks so much for your insight Andrea! You've been so awesome listening to all my whining about this guy. If I'm ever in a Chicago I'll have to buy you a coffee! Since you have been the one asking for the dates, you have become the initiator in the budding relationship. This is actually a pretty easy fix, partly because you two are on good terms and on the same page. You can simply send him a text that the next time he wants to go out, he should ask you out.
Once you become the initiator in the relationship, things tend to stick that way. He'll probably always respond to you. If that's not the dynamic you are wanting, and you want him to pick up the slack more, then kindly tell him, and he'll get the idea. You can just say FYI: you like to be asked out. I don't see anything sticking out that should concern you at this point. Then she and I kind of faded. A few months ago he started talking to me over Facebook. We talk about everything.
Good bad serious funny. It's always been super casual but with flirting. Then we didn't talk for a while and then their dad passed away. They knew it was coming. I went to the funeral to support them and be there for the family. He really loved having me there. So we kind of reconnected. He works out of town so we continued to talk over Facebook. Then things started to get more serious and heated in a good way.
He admitted to always having a crush on me since childhood and wanting to hook up. He also said he's looking for that someone to settle down with and it has to be the right girl. But with his dad passing he's not emotionally ready yet so we should take things slow. He ended up coming home for a week and wanted to see me. So we went out shooting with his friends and had so much fun.
We ended up kissing and getting a little handsy. Then I didnt hear from him the next day but I texted him instead thanking him for the fun day and asking him if he was free to do something again before he goes back to work.
He says yes and the next day we go out and have a date. It was so much fun, we laughed and talked we joked around and some serious conversation like a real couple. He payed for everything so I'm sure it was a date. Anyone who saw us must have thought we were a couple based on all the PDA and hand holding, kissing etc.
He also told me he will be working in town for a couple more weeks now. But now 2 days have gone by and again no text to set up another date. Everything is so much fun and comfortable when are together because we are such old friends things just click. He's never been the best at initiating convos because he's shy but he always replies to mine within a few minutes.
And then we can talk all day. I don't know what's up with him.
I don't want to ask him out again i want him to ask me. He can clearly see that I'm interested and he seems like he is too but then why won't he ask me to go out? Is he interested or not should I ask him again? People shut down social media sites when they need to focus their time and energy somewhere else. Sometimes when you are dealt some bad cards, then you don't want to see other people's happiness.
There are a lot of reasons people will close accounts.
Maybe it had become too stressful, maybe they need to do some soul searching, maybe they got into something they shouldn't have. Some people don't want their social media habits to distract them from their real goals. It sounds like he is hitting a refresh button on life and trying to figure out what he wants, what will be his next goals, etc. His mind is probably cloudy, and even if he does like you - he doesn't have good focus right now.
People delete these accounts because their minds are foggy. You probably did confuse him with the ticket stuff, because it comes off with a lot of mixed signals. But maybe it was too sudden for you that he was coming. He probably blames himself for that timing. It sounds like you were uncertain about what you wanted and are having a tough time juggling all these thoughts, some of which are contradictory. I don't think you screwed anything up by saying exactly where you are.
It might have been a lot for him to process, and being completely silent and going into his shell isn't exactly helpful for you, but it may have just been easier for him that way to deal with his own thoughts. No, I don't think this is a total loss. I think you need to step away from it, and in his own time when he knows what he really wants he'll contact you.
But don't keep contacting him or you'll make him feel like he should stop talking to you period. He knows his silence really stressed you out, and he probably doesn't know what to say next. Long distance is also hard to read because there could be more variables in this that you are not seeing. Interesting side note: I noticed he had deactivated his profile on the site we had met around the time things started getting shaky which would have been around the time he had his huge loss at work.
Then on the day we were supposed to meet, he deleted like almost aaaall his content from his profile. It's a non-dating site.
Today, the account was completely deleted. So, I am wondering if he is just on shut down mode. He must be in a mental place where he just can't deal with anything else external. I have no clue what happened after his loss at work, but I'm wondering if things didn't get any better.
He had like 1k followers I don't know why he would just shut everything down like that! So if this is the case, that everything is just too much, and he is just hiding from everything, is there a tiny chance he. Trust me I'm not going to hold my breath! I am going to focus on myself I'll backtrack a bit.
Last mon he had messaged me to say he bought a flight but wasn't sure if he'd be on it and he'd let me know by Friday.
On Thursday night I had a bit of a meltdown and said now probably wasn't the right time, he was probably too busy, and he should just relax and we could plan another date. I didn't hear from him during the day on Friday so I sent him another message Friday evening saying I hoped he didn't take that the wrong way, that I still wanted to see him, I just thought maybe the timing was wrong that's all.
I didn't get a reply. Then on Sunday when he was supposed to fly out I sent two msssages asking if he was still. I waited until Wednesday am the day we were supposed to meet to send him a very long winded message asking why he couldn't have just told me it was too much right now or give me some kind of heads up that he wasn't going to be coming?
I said I hadn't been trying to make things more complicated when I told him now wasn't the best time - I was trying to be considerate of his stress and inadvertently I must have upset him by telling him not to come when he had bought a ticket. I just couldn't understand why he couldn't communicate to me and let me know if he wasn't coming or not.
I basically ended he message saying there wasn't enough of me to go around to myself or my kids let alone something or someone that is illusionary. I said I wouldn't be expecting communication from him anymore and I'd take his silence as an indication that he was all set with whatever we had. I added that I just wish he hadn't seen me like this, so vulnerable and falling apart from my current situation and that I wish we could do this all over, and that if we had met when I was single and doing well on my own things would have been magical.
Then I said I wished him well I was too needy. I was too indecisive. I wrote too many messages in a time when he was too stressed. He probably just couldn't handle me and my shit. He's never even had a real girlfriend before so this was shaky ground to begin with.
He's still very young and probably wants time to himself and to date.
Dec 03, How to Tell Someone You're Not Interested. One of the hardest parts of dating is telling someone you don't want to go out with them. Whether they're asking for the first time or you've shared a few dates, you likely feel uncomfortable %(3). Feb 10, I'm a Midwesterner with a background in writing and media. My articles are mainly about relationships, dating, and heartbreak. Sometimes it is hard to tell whether someone likes you or not. This article will help you figure out when a guy isn't interested in you, based on how he texts. Of course, all rules have exceptions, and some people are Reviews: If you're expecting him to text you every day when you're new to dating, or are texting him daily, it's most likely going to push him away because you're not giving him the chance to miss you. Back in the day, which believe me I feel old saying, when you were first dating someone you had to pick up a landline and call their home number.
This was all too much too fast! I have moved the email app where we communicate to a different folder so I can't see it Is there any chance on earth, from a guys mindset, that if you liked a girl and connected well with her, but you knew it wasn't the right time and you're both going through so many things and you know you're both just completely not in the right place yet - would you completely write that girl off forever?
I mean with my behavior and the things I've done, can I just expect that I will probably never hear from him again? Or will just taking some time and space for me to grow and become a better person myself I know I can't reach out to him anymore I sent like 9 messages over the past 9 days and I've been ignored.
I know he's been online and seen them. Or did I completely destroy any chance of him wanting to talk to me again with my craziness? Or am I really not crazy, and I should just forget him because in a way he ignored me and kind of stood me up, so I don't want to be with a guy like that anyways? I am so confused, because he always seemed like a gentleman to me I didn't think he would just ignore me and not come The last message he had sent to me was he missed me and was sending a huge hug There is no telling what happened.
I say try reaching out to him again, without mentioning any of the white elephants in the room. See if he'll at least speak to you. Try to write something positive in line to his interests.
He had explained his company had a major loss, but that he had booked a ticket for this past weekend, he just wasn't sure he was going to be on it, and that he missed me and was giving me a hug. He said he'd let me know by Friday for sure. Well the night before Thurs I sent him a message saying he should just stay where he was with all he had going on.
I said maybe it wasn't the right time and I was glad he could refund his tickets, and that he should try to relax and enjoy the city. Well I didn't hear from him so I sent another message saying I wasn't trying to avoid our visit I just wasn't sure it was the right time since he had a lot going on and we haven't been talking much lately.
Back in the day, which believe me I feel old saying, when you were first dating someone you had to pick up a landline and call their home number. Therefore you would think twice before doing that, which would give you an actual chance to miss each other and allow the feelings to develop. Pretend your phone is like a land line and that sending a text message means something! If you want a guy to do his share of the work and court you, then step back to allow him to step up.
A man will treat you the way you expect him to treat you. Sign up for the Thought Catalog Weekly and get the best stories from the week to your inbox every Friday.
You may unsubscribe at any time. By subscribing, you agree to the terms of our Privacy Statement. Be patient when it comes to texting. Keep your texts short and sweet. He said they fly in today yet, he made no effort to see me or talk to me prior to their arrival. Not to mention, I have met a lot of his family already and so I'm not sure why it feels like he's trying to keep me a secret from the family coming to town.
But his lack of communication when we aren't together is confusing, especially since we are abstaining from sex. Things definitely get very passionate between us. Is he still interested or should I walk away? I've been seeing a guy for the past 3 weeks. The 2nd week he was out of town for 10 days with his kids and messaged me maybe 4 times, only one of those times without me messaging him first. I've seen him once since he returned.
He was affectionate with me the last time I saw him, it didn't seem like in his mind anything was off. But now, he has family coming to town and I haven't heard from him in 4 days. They didn't get in till today and yet, he made no effort to see me or talk to me. The way he talks to me and looks at me when we are together, makes me feel like there could be something really great between us.
Things definitely get very passionate between us, we have a hard time keeping our hands off each other and the last two times I've seen him, the last time before he went out of town and the only time since he's been back he seems like he's pushing a little harder each time for us to go ahead and have sex which I don't know if I should take to mean he likes me more or he wants to do it and move on from me.
I am not one to get this hung up on a guy so quickly but, that first week together was so amazing, it seemed like I had finally met someone who I could see myself with long term. I feel so confused by this relationship! We have been some what dating since January and during the first few months everything was perfect we texted all day long and he mad e me feel wanted. But that slowly gaffed and I felt disappointing so I called things off with him. We have both admitted we love each other.
But every time we start talking again he still remains distant he used to text me every morning and now he never texts me. Very interesting article. I always wondered this when I was in high school. Their was a boy in high school that I really liked and admired.
He and I shared so much personal and intimate information. I did ask him at one point if he liked me and he told me honestly that he only liked me as a friend. It was hard but I am glad he had the decency to tell me the truth and not lead me on. We stayed close all throughout high school. And I know he cared for me. I agree that as women, we should not take it too personally if the guy doesn't show the same intimacy or desire for a relationship as us.
We should just let them go if that is the wish. I would rather be loved and desired than be with a man who leads me on. I have a great husband now, though, and he has a wife. I am so glad that everything works out in the end despite what we feel in the moment!
MasculistFeminist- I really do appreciate you taking time to reply. I agree with you- there are technically no "rules" involved in dating, if you consider the differences between every human being. It's just easier to comprehend everything when you have some sort of "guidelines," if that's even the right word. I've just recently had issues with guys using me and acting as if they care about me, and then acting as if I never existed.
This, I know, is not the way that all guys are. I've met many a guy that are the complete opposite. I guess I'm just trying to understand what's going on in my life as well as help others that are in need some sort of assistance in their lives.
Again, thank you again for posting:. I know exactly what you mean, abbykorinnelee. I'm going through something like this and I figured I might as well write about it. I hope everything works out for you and your friend :. We met a year after high school. Still friends and I am in my thirteis.
You know I can have a certain kind of inimacy with him: and I am not shy at all, but make me say I have feelings for you duh and I will have a heart attack. I acutally after reading this decided to email it but at the end of an email that was detailing our one sided argument I hope we make it out of this funk despite it all. I wanted to respond to this article as I am quite touched by it.
From what I have read I would not be surprised if this guy is actually quite shy. I am taking a guess as I do not know him, but there were a number of tell-tale signs in what you described.
Firstly he told you how he felt initially by text rather than face to face Which is a more confronting and higher context form of communication. However when you later questioned him he did not deny his feelings.
So he meant what he said but yet again he did not initiate the face to face communication, you did. Then he says he wants to go out with you on the weekend but when the time comes his nerves overtake him and he bails.
Don't be mistaken, just because a guy might appear settled around you, does not mean he feels that way in side. I am certainly not picking on you, but women need to understand that not every guy is a hunter and not every girl is meant to be the hunted. There are a lot of shy guys out there and many get quite nervous or simply don't make the first move even when we are starstruck in love.
It is only natural for you to want the guy to make the first text or call. That is what we have been socialised to expect in dating. However many men and women have personalities that simply don't conform to these social norms and expectations.
Sometimes women are better suited to playing role of the hunter in dating and men the hunted. It differs from one individual to the next and there is no one size fits all.
Again I don't blame you, in the modern age the rules of dating need serious revision. We could all learn something Me included! The reason I responded was because I myself am a fairly shy guy and it sounded to me like this guy might be a bit afraid. Generally the more afraid a shy guy is, the more he likes you. Often in the past I have been very nervous around girls when we have first gone out. I have not bailed, but once I had to go to the bathroom to catch my breath.
I was pretty in love at the time! I have also really had to work myself up to ask them out and make the first move. I have found that I get way more relaxed when the girl takes the lead. I have also discovered when things happen more slowly I relax a lot more too. This notion that guys want to get into bed with women as fast as possible is often very untrue. Rather than this guy being a tool not saying that you think that way about himI suspect he might be a really nice but shy guy.
If I could offer a suggestion it would for you to continue to take the lead a bit. What will happen after a while is he will start to come out of his shell.
Ask him how he is going and encourage him to talk. Show interest and attention when he does talk and he will be feel more and more at ease with you. Perhaps do an activity with him that acts as an icebreaker or meet up with friends first and later on have one on one time.
I am certainly no expert on dating, they are just suggestions. Thank you for sharing this online. It is good to know how the other gender experiences things like this. I can learn from you and we can learn from each other.
All I can say is how you feel is not mutually exclusive to women. We worry about whether girls like us as much we hope they do all the time! Both genders seriously do need to move beyond guys always making the first move. I can't begin to tell you how many relationships girls miss out on because they don't make the first move themselves.