Home Recent Discussions Search. Ok, I've been single for about 6 months and recently, an old acquaintance from high school told me I should really start talking to her friend, we will call him Jim. She says he is her best friend, that he is the sweetest guy ever and that alot of girls won't talk to them because they are shallow because he is a big boy but he treats the person he is with like a queen. Now generally, all the men I have dated have been "big boys" I prefer a bigger man. So I didn't really think anything of it, and who am I to judge? I weigh lbs
Getting in a relationship thinking your are going to change him, what could possibly go wrong? I see you working it on here and you are doing great!
Dating morbidly obese
How could he hinder you? He will not make you eat things you don't want to eat. He will not tell you that you shouldn't exercise. He won't say "Don't log your food!
I don't think that anything will stop you. I do think that you might inspire him. But make sure that if you are going to get involved that you would be content with him being just the person he is right now If he scoffs and isn't interested, it's probably worth not getting involved.
Have you already told him that you are actually trying to lose weight and that you plan to do all those things you weren't able to do before?
700 lb. Woman Thinks She's Perfectly Healthy (Dr. Phil)
It might be a good idea to have his opinion on the subject. I do agree though that starting a relationship already planning to change the other person isn't a good thing. What is perfectly fine, though, is talk to him about your journey and explain that you would like to have a supportive person beside you, keeping on mind that he can be supportive even without changing his way of living.
It's not shallow because you're concerned from a health standpoint. You're changing your life and health and fitness and it's compeltely reasonable to not get involved with someone that doesn't feel the same way.
Since you're not already dating, there's nothing wrong with backing away and focusing on yourself.
I would just tell him that you've undergone major changes in your diet, activity level, and overall health and since it's still a work in progress, you need to continue to focus on your own well being before bringing another person into it, but that you know the person you want in your life will also have to be working towards a healthy goal.
If he's not what you want right now, then don't date him. As somebody who has lost their other half, if I were you I wouldn't date him. I would worry about him killing himself because of his weight and his lack of wanting to get healthy. In my eyes I'd be afraid of falling head over heels and then losing him to a heart attack. That's just me, and it's nothing against the guy.
Dating morbidly obese man
Hi there. I agree with knjitters, that was exactly my first thought. Just be upfront about what you are going through now.
Maybe he really wants to lose weight, but thinks it is a lost cause and needs support. It could be the start of something great, especially given you guys have a lot in common already. Wishing you all the best. Going straight in with the mindset of "changing him" is not a good thing at all.
Dating a morbidly obese person..
Accept him for who he is or move on. You might motivate him to change his lifestyle, but that should be a bonus, not an expectation. He "might" follow your path, he might not. I wouldn't go into a relationship on the premise of thinking or hoping he would.
Since he's not trying to get healthier, what if he continues to gain - two or three hundred more pounds - ends up bedridden or not very mobile?
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Are you going to devote your life to taking care of his needs at that point? Are you willing to take care of someone not willing to take care of themselves regardless of how nice he is or how well you get along? I don't think it's shallow to not be attracted to someone very heavy, very thin, based on hair color, etc. It's a matter of personal preference.
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This is a really hard situation. You cannot go into the situation wanting him to be smaller. Would you not want to date him anymore?
Just continue with being his friend. Ask him to do all the things that you want to do. Across england, just gotten asked to be with poorer asthma. Despite being overweight, and only dating has been big fat, but it wouldn't know is primarily based on which includes many times.
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